GIVING IT TO YOU RAW…What Happened Last Night (Feb. 23rd, 2015)

Fast Lane has come and gone and we’re more or less back at the beginning in a lot of senses, Enthusiasts.  With Randy Orton back in televised action, we can just about pick up where we left off when Roman Reigns had to go on the Disabled List with an “incarcerated hernia”.  And with the Heavyweight Championship Title match settled as well, we can all focus on the hijinks and drama set to ensue on the way to WrestleMania.  RAW did its usual Pay Per View follow-up where much of  what transpired on Sunday comes up for review and in some cases gets reversed. I would say there wasn’t too much of the latter but interesting addenda have been introduced to the mix and we may have ourselves quite the little mélange for March, 29^th.

We open in Nashville, Tennessee to a livelier crowd than the one we had in Memphis and to greet us right off the bat, The Viper, Randy Orton.  Orton is a little miffed this evening.  Yeah-yeah, it’s great he’s back but he’s still gnawing on that shit Seth Rollins pulled last time Orton was with us.  That fucking punk Curbstomped me!  Who the hell does that sniveling, little shit think he is!  He got away last night but I got something for him and I can't wait to give it to him!   The crowd supports Orton’s revenge enough for Orton to go, Fuck it!  Rollins!  Get your spineless ass out here!  I’m gonna kick it right now!  Yet, instead, The Authority decide to befriend an irate Orton.  Stephanie is diplomatic, as always, and greets our estranged anti-hero.  Randy!  So great to see you, buddy!  It’s great to have you back.  What you did at Fast Lane, man that’s the kind of Orton we need to see.  Come on, let’s just put the past behind us and get back to doing what we do best, fucking shit up.  What do you say?  Well, Orton says nuts to that.  I’m not going back to The Authority and besides, I’m jonesing to put a foot up Rollins’ ass.  Big Show then tries to talk some sense into Orton.  Randy listen, hey, I know we’ve been through a lot but being with The Authority has made nothing but sense.  You gotta admit, it’s better than going it alone and being in with the bosses never hurts.  But Orton’s not hearing it.  Naw, man…I’m no sell-out.  Perhaps not, Stephanie chimes in, but you’re not exactly “Employee of the Year”.  You’ve caused me all kinds of hell throughout the years, but I always try to be understanding and mature.  I’m willing to let that water flow right under the bridge if you are.  Why don’t we meet and talk about this more in-depth?  Orton takes some time to think and eventually decides to hear Stephanie out.

The first match of the night has Dolph Ziggler face an irritated Wade “Bad News” Barrett.  That cur, Dean Ambrose, has his bleeding title belt and he’s in no mood for anything.  And to add to the annoyance factor, R-Truth is sitting in on commentary.  Ziggler, always up for a match, puts the residual drama aside, and these 2 have at.  Ziggler gives us our money’s worth and BNB takes out his frustration on him.  He slams him down mercilessly at one point.  Damn near broke him in half, as I’ve heard Jim Ross say.  Yet, nothing seems to keep “Scrappy McScrapperton” down.  In the meantime, R-Truth tries to drum up a little sympathy for his own personal cause, feeling a little overlooked.  I would have to agree.  He’s actually a pretty solid wrestler and is able to pull off more of the involved/complicated moves.  He’s definitely underutilized but I would think looking like he just got out of prison in front of a “PG” crowd most of the time has something to do with that.  I wouldn’t suggest a change of gimmick but an acceptance of the limits of his particular one yet, if Ziggler has done anything it’s prove that busting your ass does in fact payoff.  R-Truth may just have to dial it up a little whether he’s winning or jobbing.  In any case, Barrett and Ziggler dance for a good minute before Ziggler connects with his ZigZag and claims himself another well-earned win.   Nevertheless, Barrett’s bad day continues as Dean Ambrose, the real bane of his existence, presents himself with the coveted Intercontinental Championship Title in hand.   He dangles it before Barrett before snatching it back and then gives Ziggler a soft, duel-challenging shoulder check as he passes by.  Apparently, these fellows aren’t friends.

We then get into some varied Tag Team action with the Prime Time Players up against The Ascension.  With this outing, it’s not so much about the match as what happens after the match.  The Ascension, as they have portrayed themselves, come out ready to commence mass destruction when Darren Young manages to get a roll-up pin after just a few minutes.   Absolutely enraged, The Ascension deny any claims of defeat and proceed to decimate Titus O’Neil and Young, leaving Young to succumb to the Fall of Man.  Slowly but surely, The Ascension are amounting to something…still hard to take them seriously though.  They remind me of a spoof.  I feel like they’re part of a sketch comedy routine.

Anyway, it’s time for another promo and it’s Roman Reigns to lead the charge this time and it’s not all that bad.  Though we have Paul Heyman in to do the real talking, this promo is far more palatable.  What we basically get here is Creative’s attempt to get We the Audience to accept Reigns as our WrestleMania main-eventer.   Now, fans are gonna feel how fans are gonna feel.  Reigns will have fans that like him just ‘cause he’s hot.  They’ll be haters because his skills as a wrestler and performer can still be fairly criticized and then they’ll be the lot of us who are either indifferent or remain undecided until his rough edges are buffed.  This is just how it is.  Daniel Bryan comes out and says, though he’s still a bit sour about the outcome of Fast Lane, he accepts it and supports Reigns’ WrestleMania hopes.   Heyman sets the projected WrestleMania scene by  acknowledging Reigns' might but also the bad timing.  This would have all been different if things had gone differently but there's one thing for sure.  Doubtful you'll stand a chance against BROCK LESNARRRRR!    Heyman rocks the mic as only he can but, what he can’t do here is cover-up the truth.  The main thing the WWE is running up against is reality.  They’re continuing to keep Reigns’ push within the realm of the “story” but the thing is, that’s bullshit and we know it.  Vince McMahon and the WWE Powers That Be have decided this outcome so there’s no reason for Reigns to act like he’s made a great accomplishment.  This is what makes doing the promos in this fashion pointless.  We know what’s going on and to pitch it from an angle as if Reigns actually won the match causes We the Audience to lose interest.  It basically just boils down to, “this is what we’re doing so, deal with it…”  Even so, Reigns has done a great job of a late keeping it together and is a real trooper because I'm sure most wouldn't have handled all this very well.  I’m sure he’s had his freak out moments but, I feel he should be commended for just hanging in there.  This has certainly been a rough ride and the issue is greater than him.  The WWE has to focus on establishing a coherent train of thought through its “story” for an extended period of time if they want us to half care.  Reigns is better off presenting an argument from the perspective of having done what he had to do.  He came out. He beat Daniel Bryan’s ass and now he’s going to WrestleMania.  Anyone who has a problem with that, can suck it.  End promo.  That allows for a beef with “The Authority” be it real or fabricated and maintains respect and/or potential rivalry for Daniel Bryan.  Just saying, bet you that would fly a lot better.  In the meantime, all Reigns can do is keep at it.  His performance will get better in time because what we’re dealing with is an issue of comfort in that regard.  That’s why I keep saying give him a year or 2.  Once he gets comfortable, it’ll resonate throughout and whoever keeps bitching after that can be officially written off.  As long as he’s doing the work, it’ll show.  These are the Way of Things.

Moving along, we have our predicted Tag Team rematch between The Usos and Tyson Kidd and Cesaro with Naomi and Natalya on the sidelines respectively.  This match is as solid as the one held on Sunday night and it should be expected.  These 6 are some of the WWE’s stronger offerings in the sense that you can always expect quality matches.  These guys and gals can wrassle.  Yet, it’s the drama outside that catches our attention as Nattie and Naomi sell their cat-fighting at ringside.   Nattie interferes with the match too, causing the disqualification in favor of The Usos but Kidd and Cesaro get to keep the titles.  It’s hard to see Nattie go to the Darkside but thinking of The Usos as Heels just seems blasphemous.

The next match has Stardust going up against Jack Swagger and it’s just not what it could be.  This is a shame because it’s obvious that Stardust/Cody Rhodes is putting a lot into developing his character, right down to how he moves.  This shows dedication and I think that should be acknowledged.  This is why I’m still placing blame on Creative here.  There’s plenty you can do with Stardust and it’s all falling flat because Creative doesn’t really know what its point is besides setting up WrestleMania and it's hard to say if they're doing a good job of that.  That aside, Stardust goes into it against Swagger with good vigor and the crowd tries to help some by shouting “Cody” to prompt a character breakdown.  Yet, Goldust presents himself to rattle the younger Dust Brother and Swagger manages to settle into his Patriot Lock to cause the submission.  The crowd amps up the “CODY” and Stardust plays along.

This brings us to our 3^rd promo of the night as John Cena comes out to address what happened at Fast Lane.  You want to know what happened at Fast Lane?  Rusev’s a big ol’coward, that’s what happened at Fast Lane.  He can’t stand seeing a guy who’s got heart, fight the good fight.  Well, he may have made me break with the Accolade but I never gave up and I’ll be making pelmeni with Rusev the second I get a chance!  Well, Rusev and Lana can’t let that go without a rebuttal.  They come out and Lana lays on the guilt and shame.  What a pitiful way to lose.  These people should be glad they have a superior athlete to represent them, not some aging, poor excuse for a wrestler.  She lets Rusev say some things, half of which in Russian but he basically says the same thing.  Cena is useless waste and embarrassment to himself and his country, which is worthless anyway.  Hey now! Don’t you go talking bad about my country! Cena jumps up.  Say what you want about me but when it comes to this fine nation, that’s a line I can’t let you cross.  You can bet your ass we’re going again at WrestleMania!

To follow, we have some disconcerting Divas action that may be Creative just fucking with the crowd or displaying their disdain for the Divas Division.  We have Paige paired with Emma, seeing how they’re both UK affiliated and The Bella Twins.   I like Emma but barely got to see any of her because Brie comes out and FaceBusts her and that’s it.  Paige deals a kick to Brie for the lack of match but Nikki gets defensive and gives Paige a face full of elbow.  She also holds up the belt so we don’t forget who it belongs to.  Word is there were a lot of rewrites going on for this episode of RAW.  That’s probably why this match is treated as an after-thought.

We then get a little comedic relief with Curtis Axel continuing the long-running gag of his non-involvement in the Royal Rumble.  He still wants his Heavyweight Championship Title shot!  Well, this time Ryback comes out to shut him up and shut him down.  Axel is being a trooper about this too and it’s cool of him to play along and be the butt of this joke.  Nevertheless, I don’t think we need to see too much more of it but, technically this could go on for as long as Axel’s career so, we’ll see if it becomes a part of his shtick.  In any case, Ryback makes short work of him and takes the win with a ShellShock.

This leaves the Main Event in the form of Seth Rollins and Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan and Roman Reigns.  That’s right, Enthusiasts we get some “sexy back” with Orton and Reigns.  I know it’s wrong but these are 2 who I can watch go at it for however long and it doesn’t matter who wins. We all do in this case, don't we (^_~)  I never said I was in this for entirely wholesome reasons.  Anyway, this match is fun as it should be since all our main guys are in it. Orton begrudgingly decides to side with The Authority again after some coaxing from Stephanie in a backstage promo.  Everyone gets to do what they do best in this row.  I found it quite delightful when Orton took Reigns down with a Powerslam from a rebound off the ropes.  No one does it better.  Orton also gets props for displaying some ACTING! when Rollins tags himself in while he’s dealing with Reigns later in the match.  Completely offended, Orton disengages.  Distracting Rollins and leaving him open to get Superman Punched.   Reigns sets up to finish the job with a Spear but Bryan wants to help too and he playfully tags himself in to get the win with the Flying Knee.  Yet, we know how Orton is.  Can’t let shit go.  So, he RKOs Jaime Noble to blow off some steam and then eyes Rollins………before walking away.

All in all, not a bad RAW but we all know what the problems are.  As we go along, those flaws are only going to get more obvious.   Band-aids aren’t gonna help this.  This whole operation may need surgery but we know how that goes.   Let’s just hope they have a plan for if/when it finally craps out.  ‘Til then, Smackdown some "Army of Darkness" if you would.

See You Thursday,

-Nicole Alexis.