PUTTIN’ THAT SMACKDOWN…What Happened Last (Tuesday) Night [May 21st, 2015]

How’s it going, Enthusiasts?  So, we come to Smackdown in between Payback and Elimination Chamber and, to be honest, it very much feels that way.  The action isn’t so much that you pay full attention but at the same time, you keep an eye on things just so you’re kinda on the same page with everyone else.  I wouldn’t call this “phoning it in”, though.  This appears quite strategic, for once.  With 2 Pay Per Views basically 2 weeks from each other, I would definitely say this is a sort of pacing mechanism.  They don’t want to give us too much for free yet, they want to keep us interested enough to throwdown.

We open in Norfolk, Virginia and surprisingly enough, it’s Roman Reigns who starts it off today.  For some reason, the WWE believes he’s been away.  I wouldn’t call coming back from a night off a “return” per se but, I guess there are some out there who think 1 day is too many for him to be gone (^_~)  Anyway, if we didn’t notice, he didn’t win at Payback.  Got to put a foot up Seth Rollins’ ass though so, it’s not all bad.  Besides, Reigns is a guy who has contingency plans.  Payback didn’t pan out?  No prob, he’s got his eyes on Money in the Bank now and he’s gonna enter the Ladder Match.  That’s great, buddy!  Dean Ambrose says as he enters from backstage.  That’s one of your better traits.  Always got a back-up.   I’m not one for plans.   I like to fly by the seat of my pants.  It’s just how I do.  Yet, that tactic has its pluses.  It got me this HeavyWeight Championship match at Elimination Chamber so, you know…feeling pretty good about that.  My plans so far, are to become the HeavyWeight Champion so…we’ll see how that goes.  Well, I’m not mad at you.  Reigns basically replies.  But just know that I plan on winning at MITB and whoever has the title, I’ll be watching.  *Ahem* Excuse me, boys…Dad (Kane) makes his way out.  Always nice to see you 2 together.  I’m glad things are still going strong between you.  Unfortunately, I have to burst your little bubble before your date at Olive Garden.  You see, the main reason I’m with The Authority is because I’ve been in this business a long time.   I’m sure the 2 of you used to watch me on TV when you were little.  Yet, you kids have to learn the primary lesson that the WWE Universe teaches us, is that “The Authority” always wins.  Is that so? Reigns chimes in.  Well, last I saw, you were on your back.  Have the rules changed or something? Har-dee-har-har, you’re so funny, Dad replies.  I got a joke for you too.  What happens when you say you’re going to win at Money in the Bank?...Stumped?  Here’s the answer, you don’t go.  No, Reigns you’re going to continue to “take a break” until your entitled ass earns yourself a spot.   Matter of fact, why don’t you just take the whole damn night off and think about all the matches you haven't won.   Ambrose, you’re on with Bray Wyatt at the end of the night.  Sort of typical start, if you ask me. 

The first full match is a big ol’8-Man-Tag with The Ascension, Lucha Dragons, Los Matadores and Cesaro & Tyson Kidd.  This was fun melee of a match, especially when the Lucha Dragons come leaping in.  I’m decidedly partial to the Lucha Dragons and so after a lot of dance and play they come out on top. Lucha! Lucha! Lucha! Lucha!...

Next up, “The Player” Dolph Ziggler makes his way out to the ring to face off against Wade Barrett.  Now, what’s more prevalent here is that Lana has supposedly “left” Rusev and has settled upon Dolph Ziggler.  Ziggler may be “The Show-Off” but he wasn’t born last night.  Lana’s not the first hot lady that’s “laid a claim” and he knows she’s playing some game but, she’s so cute, he doesn’t really mind.   As for the match itself, it was a solid outing.  Nothing too spectacular but not a bad match.  We’ve seen these blokes go at it before and so, the match is what an Enthusiast would expect.  Wasteland here, Famouser there, Winds of Change about here.  Ziggler recovers and does a Superkick and then with some slick maneuvering, Ziggler rolls Barrett up for the win.  Lana, being at least willing in this burgeoning exchange, comes out to congratulate her new “beau”?

After that, Paige comes out and she has all kinds of shit to say about Naomi and Tamina.  It bordered on being a bit too much.  The thing about shit talk is that it has to be funny to be effective.  Paige’s likening Tamina to a man was simply just that.  There wasn’t anything funny about what she said.  Now, if Paige said something more like “I better not get too close to Naomi or Tamina might get jealous…” then we can see some humor in her juxtaposition but what she said just comes off mean and so, you kinda like when Naomi and Tamina come out to kick her ass.  If that’s what Creative was going for, good job.  Doesn’t really matter to me, I suppose what I’m getting at is Paige supposed to be a Face or a Heel or does it not matter?  Because after the beatdown, Nikki Bella comes running out for what looks like the save but it’s more to make a statement as she some how sends Tamina and Naomi off and Rack Attacks, Paige to show who’s got the title and to sell the Divas Triple Threat match at Elimination Chamber.

For some reason or another, R-Truth and Stardust have been dance partners of late.  And for some reason or another, R-Truth has been taking all the wins.  Well, if they’re gonna continue on in this manner, they should at least have Stardust get frustrated and take out a kendo stick or something.  Make it interesting.

We have some more fluff in “The Mega Powers” with Curtis Axel and Damien Sandow in Hogan and Macho Man attire going up against Adam Rose and Heath Slater.  Well, with “The Mega Powers” a bit more over than Rose and Slater, you needn’t be left in suspense as to who would win but you at least have some fun and a chuckle or go get another beer.  It’s all good in my opinion.

That brings us in for the main event with Dean Ambrose and Bray Wyatt.  I’ve grown fond of their matches.  They aren’t always the cleanest affairs but they tell a great story.  Wyatt’s crazy and Ambrose’s crazy so we get a full-on bout of Crazy.  Well, it starts off with Wyatt strong on offense, cocky from their last match.  He plays around with Ambrose and Ambrose is happy to play back with cuts and jabs and rebounding off the ropes.  He tries a cross-body check but Wyatt’s got a little too much meat on him and Ambrose takes himself out instead.  Wyatt roughs Ambrose up, tangles him up in the ropes.  Ambrose doesn’t take to being disrespected kindly and wriggles his way out and starts to mount a mild comeback but that’s when we check our phones and see we only got about 3 minutes left and so, J&J Security run out and do their interfering but it’s Seth Rollins making an appearance as well that raises eyebrows.  This scene is about to get mighty unfair.  But what’s this!  Is someone taking a break from the catering table?  It’s Roman Reigns and suddenly Rollins is reconsidering this venture.  Wyatt says he isn’t scared and Reigns goes, oh really?  Gets down to the ring and jumps up and Superman Punches Wyatt from the floor.  Ambrose goes, why thank you and rolls Wyatt up with the referee caught up with J&J this entire time.

So, what did you think Enthusiasts?  Did you have fun?  I had an all right time.  I’ll go ahead and watch Elimination Chamber and after that well…we’ll see if they make it interesting enough.

See You Monday,

-Nicole Alexis.